Horse Meat Served To South Carolina FEMA Camp Occupants

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Horse Meat – It’s What’s For Dinner… And Breakfast, And Lunch…

(Columbia, SC) – Several hundred horses are currently being slaughtered and processed to create the delicious potted meat product that will inevitably be feeding thousands of FEMA camp occupants for the duration of their residency at the government run compounds.

“We are basically killing two birds with one stone here”, explained Michael Getman, executive coordinator of the plant which is fueled by a generous government subsidy to process the animals into food. In an exclusive interview Michael explained the reasoning behind the program and how it will be beneficial to the inhabitants of the recently constructed FEMA dwellings.

“There has been a persistent nationwide issue with equine overpopulation. Agencies all over America have seized several animals whom owners were unable to provide homes for. Oftentimes these animals are severely malnourished and neglected. Rather than have this problem go on unaddressed, we plan to take advantage of the situation and generate a viable protein source that is ready to consume for those who are living within the newly erected FEMA structures.”

Dozens Of Horse Trailers Were Seen Lining Up To The Plant’s Intake Corral Where Hundreds Of Unwanted Equine Had Already Been Dropped Off From All Over The State

The program has been met with intense criticism and outrage from animal rights activists as well as advocates for the homeless. “It is not acceptable to force impoverished people to eat nothing but horse meat who have essentially been forced to live in a government run squat!” Shouted Amanda Allbrecht on the steps of Columbia City Hall during a demonstration earlier this week. A few dozen concerned residents marched throughout the afternoon to express their distaste for the program that is being hailed as a grand solution to multiple conflicts by its supporters.

“I don’t see what the big deal is really” Commented Robert Shaw, who we spotted on the opposite side of the street holding both middle fingers up in the direction of the protesters. “You got a bunch of horses that are dying from neglect and a bunch of winos, junkies and riff-raff that don’t need to be causing trouble for the decent folks here in town. You ship ’em off to where they can’t be a bother and let ’em eat some horse meat. Hell, they should be happy we are feeding them at all! All these liberal schmucks who are getting so worked up about it should adopt a few dozen starving horses and let some of these scumbags crash in their house for a couple of weeks and maybe then they can tell us what the best solution would be.”

Regardless of the opinions of residents and activists, the plant plans on moving forward with it’s original goals. Dozens of horse trailers were seen lining up to the plant’s intake corral where hundreds of unwanted equine had already been dropped off from all over the state. The program encourages anyone who has an unwanted animal to transport it to the facility in exchange for a tax write off.

Jane M. Agni (2013, November 6)
Originally Published On National Report

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Jane Agni

Jane Agni

Jane M. Agni is a professional journalist residing in the rain-soaked city of Portland, Oregon. She is currently Editor-In-Chief of the websites, Every Woman Weekly, and Self-Worth Digest, in addition to being Senior Journalist for the infamous news satire site, National Report. Follow Jane on Facebook, Twitter, and Google Plus for daily updates on new articles and more.
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