(Portland, Oregon) – The City of Roses has issued a water boil alert after three consecutive drinking water samples were found to contain heavy traces of E.Coli and other bacteria. On Thursday the Portland Water Bureau issued the following warning via their official website:
“Until further notice, all Portland Water Bureau customers and those in the affected areas should boil all tap water used for drinking, food preparation, tooth brushing and ice for at least one minute. Ice or any beverages prepared with un-boiled tap water on or after May 20 should be discarded. Detailed maps, fact sheets and additional information can be found at the links below or by calling Customer Service at 503-823-7770. ”
Over 400,000 residents are without drinkable water, even affecting adjoined counties with a fetid concoction pouring from their kitchen’s spicket. A statement was released to the press by bureau director David Shaff which said the following.
“The boil water advisory affects customers of the Portland Water Bureau and water districts for Burlington, the city of Gresham (north of Interstate 84), Lake Grove, Lorna Portland Water, Palatine Hill, Rockwood, Tigard Water Service Area (including Durham, King City and Bull Mountain), Valley View and West Slope.”
The Northwest Water And Wildlife Foundation has set up camp near the Washington Park Reservoir 3 to run further tests and help determine an appropriate course of action for the rainy city. National Report asked NEWF’s Director Of Operations, Dale Harris, what he and his scientists have found in the tainted H20.
“We’ve studied several samples of the drinking water in and around Portland, and have found the existence of many different pathogens, including E. Coli, Giardia Lamblia, and Cryptosporidium. A handful of these bacteria cultures can only been created under the most squalid living conditions, akin to those seen in 3rd World countries. Our group hasn’t observed water this contaminated since our crew tested the Umgeni River in South Africa. Scientifically, this is a fascinating occurrence, however, the safety of Portland’s residents is our primary concern. It is a potentially catastrophic event and I cannot foresee their water supply being safe for consumption anytime soon.”
I inquired from Mr. Harris how exactly the city’s water could be so throughout contaminated. “We can only speculate at this point, but if I had to make an educated guess, I would say it is due to the inhabitants, and their unsanitary lifestyles. For a supposed “green city”, there is an extraordinary amount of pollution here; That which rivals the environment of the Victorian era.”
Portland, Oregon has quickly become one of the least favorable American cities to live in, due to reports of rampant racism, venereal disease and gentrification. Now, lacking clean water, the situation could devolve into pure anarchy, and possibly be put under martial law if citizens become too rampageous. Assuredly, this subject won’t be covered in the next episode of Portlandia.
Jane M. Agni (2014, May 24)
Originally Published On National Report